We’ve got battles to fight and rights to right but maybe after a cuppa and a biscuit eh?

Last weeks blog was about how I feel that we do not genuinely have freedom, how I am disenchanted with many aspects of our so-called ‘democracy’ and how I wish there genuinely was an option to ‘opt out of society’.

 

As you can imagine, where there is a revolt or an uprising against the controlling powers, my senses are generally sympathetic towards the oppressed and the battle cry of ‘Viva la revolución’ is never far from my lips. Not because I am naturally a troublemaker an anarchist or anti-establishment per se, I am in fact a very law abiding citizen but it is moreover because I like to think that we, the underdogs, will always remain challenging and defiant, if the need calls for it, of the ruling classes.

Thus, having spent much of this week writing a very long, detailed and, might I say, edgy journalistic piece on the recent dreadful situation in the region of Catalonia (which many of you will know is very dear to me) it occurred to me that you wonderful people don’t read my blog for a breakdown or yet another opinion on the ‘actual news’. You read my blog for a break from the endless, depressing, oppressive, monotony of political debate.

So, instead of today’s blog being all doom and gloom about the oppressors of democracy, I will instead provide you a little ‘pause for thought’ about some of the better known and perhaps some lesser known conspiracy theories.

Well if this doesn’t pop-up on the old Homeland Security filters I’d be very surprised. Still, that’s one way of crawling out of total obscurity as a writer, I guess, and I’m sure that nothing more than a cursory glance by the Spooks will be needed to realise that I am merely saying what countless others have said before me, though of course in my very own inimitable style.

 

JFK

Was the 1963 John F Kennedy assassination an inside job? The debate has continued for over five decades and whilst there is currently nothing new to be added to it, everything has literally been said before, Donald Trump (sometimes referred to as ‘The President of the United States of America’) has until 26th October to decide whether to release all of the Government records amassed on the JFK Assassination for the first time. Of course, even if this does happen many of the general public will still suspect a cover-up and that any documents that may have pointed to foul play will undoubtedly already have been destroyed, they have, after all, had fifty-four years in which to adequately cover their tracks!!!!

 

La Belle Lune

What if Americans never really did go to the moon ‘back in the summer of 69’?Is it really so difficult to believe that in the enormous, prestigious space race, a handful of people could have lied? Shock horror! That a studio could have been easily equipped to look very much like the moon and hey presto, we got ourselves the first televised moon landing!

one small step for man, one giant leap for mankind

To this day, it is no easy feat to repeat the success even with the enormous leaps and bounds in technology, so do we really believe that almost five decades ago, they had the technology to not only launch a manned mission to the moon but also to land man on the surface and most incredibly of all, to take back off again from the surface of the moon, return to a waiting shuttle and then return safely to Earth?  Hmmmm, I wonder??? <drums fingers whilst pondering thoughtfully>

 

Area 51

What really is inside the highly secure Edwards Air Force Base in Nevada? Apart from, of course, a shitload of filing cabinets, paper clips and buff coloured folders marked ‘Top Secret’. Does it contain any extra-terrestrial innovation that may have given the USA a leap forward in technology, perhaps to go to the moon for instance? See where I’m going with this?

 

Les Pyramides splendides

With the moon landing in question or at least as to whether we had the ability to achieve that on our own merits without extraterrestrial componentry, who really did build those bloody awesome Pyramids? They are an incredible feat of engineering. Mathematically they are perfect with both Pi and Phi represented in the proportions. Astronomically they are spot on aligning perfectly with the Constellation of Orion and due North.

They were originally covered with highly polished casing stones which gave each pyramid a smooth and very reflective surface, scientists believe that with these in place, it would have been possible to see them from the moon whilst they were reflecting the suns light. The Great Pyramid (the largest of all three) is apparently composed of some two million, three hundred thousand large stones and is estimated to weigh almost SIX MILLION tons. It is almost impossible to achieve the building of the structures today, even with the advent of supercomputers and laser technology, not to mention some seriously heavy duty lifting equipment. Is it really possible that mere human beings could have built these structures with just their bare hands some thousands of years ago?  So just who did build them and how? Some speculate that alien visitors had a hand in their creation and were then worshipped as Gods.

 

Human Race (more like a slow crawl than a race to be honest)

With the question of how the pyramids came to be, still ringing in your ears my next contemplation is this: Is Earth simply a human colony, a legacy perhaps of a more advanced civilization from another world and another time, whether that be the past or the future?  This could quite effectively answer many, many questions.    With the exception of a few very gifted individuals and myself and present company excluded, of course, we are, in the main a bunch of retarded dipshits. Two hundred, thousand years of learning and evolving to end up sharing minion memes on social media and buying fidget-spinners in their gazillions. It seems a shameful waste of intellect. Are we effectively going backward? Perhaps the human race actually reached its peak some several thousand years ago with the Maya Civilization or the Ancient Egyptians (and of course with the help of a few alien friends) and since then we have been abandoned and are now in our decline, on our long slow crawl back to Neanderthal man.

Perhaps this is instead our Devolution!

 

 

Crop circles

Who was responsible for all of those increasingly artful crop circles? Were they simply the elaborate hoaxes and high-jinks of sci-fi nerds, stoned teenagers and cheeky pranksters or the work of something more ominous? Perhaps our enigmatic ‘creators’ popped back for a quick visit, saw the embarrassing state of humanity and decided to up-anchors and disappear pronto, deciding that we were best left to a fate of our own moronic making.

 

Reptilian People

Really??? There is certainly a very powerful set of people, a very small minority, who seemingly run and influence the entire planet, but is it likely that underneath their various demeanors they are, in fact, reptile humanoids? I think not. I think it is probably more accurate and certainly far more believable that they are in fact just incredibly greedy, ruthless, despicable human beings.

 

The very tragic and indeed, incredibly controversial 9/11

Talking of ruthless, despicable human beings, were the atrocities carried out on 9/11 a mass cover-up, perhaps a false flag exercise? Many people think so, some 42% of Americans, in fact, believe there is far more to it, but for the larger percentage of people, it is just too horrific and unbelievable to suspect foul play by our own illustrious leaders, despite the seemingly enormous amounts of evidence that suggests all is not quite right. Having viewed various documentaries on the subject, I can confirm that the most compelling for me was the 2007 documentary ‘911 Ripple Effect’ by William Lewis and Dave von Kleist.

I still don’t know exactly what I DO believe, but I know at least this much, we’ll surely NEVER know ‘the truth, the whole truth and nothing but the truth so help me God!’

 

The Illuminati, The Elders of Zion and the New World Order

Huh????

 

Chemtrails

Boring……Who cares!!!!

 

The Mandela-ela-ela Effect

Mass delusion? Group hysteria? Power of suggestion? Parallel Universes?

If you have never heard of the Mandela Effect then I suggest you look it up first, because I probably will not be able to explain it properly and to copy any definition here is to essentially plagiarise. Basically, it centers around Confabulation, a most wonderful word that really should be used more often.

One, in particular, the much-discussed theory about Jaws’ girlfriend, from the James Bond film ‘Moonraker’, was enough even to have my own mother subscribing to this particular belief. Essentially the cutesy, petite, little blonde was remembered to have had braces on her teeth and then there was this whole hoo-hah of “what had happened to her braces?” how had ‘they’ (the Adjustment Bureau perhaps, who knows!) managed to find and edit every living copy of the film to now portray her without her braces? To me the answer was simple, she never had them. It was just a pure case of being mistaken and once someone had voiced this erroneous belief as a ‘fact’ it gathered momentum and garnered a whole host of believers and subscribers in their tens of thousands. Where were her braces goddammit? Don’t try and fill our heads with these mistruths, with your crafty shenanigans and witchcraft, we’re onto you!

Personally I find it much easier to believe that it is entirely possible for ‘collective confabulation’ to exist (look, it’s a fabulous word, so why not use it twice in one single article), rather than to believe that there is some ‘force’ or ‘agency’ at work, busily changing things that have occurred in the past, for instance; randomly editing film clips or changing the titles of well-known books or the spelling of popular restaurants. It is not because I am narrow minded that I believe this, just that it seems ultimately more plausible. I distinctly remember once swearing blind to my brother that a song we both liked when we were growing up had used some of the intro from Abba’s 1980 hit Gimme! Gimme! Gimme! (A Man After Midnight). At the time I could neither remember the artist or the title of the other song, so I was at a complete loss to prove my ‘fact’ right but I was still absolutely certain that it contained elements of the aforementioned Abba song, until, that is,  my brother recalled both the artist and the title and played it to me and I was WRONG! Shocker!

Nothing like it whatsoever! Yet I had been so adamant, so sure.

Perhaps there are others out there who have the same distorted memory as me and if so, we could group together and indignantly claim that it has been changed by those pesky, paranormal pranksters!

The piece of music in question was/is:
La Serenissima (Venice in Peril) – Rondo Veneziano 1981.

 

Hey…WTF?

Amongst my incredibly flimsy ‘investigations’ from the comfort of my sofa, into some of these urban legends/conspiracy theories, which may or may not indeed be true, one I had never before heard of, despite my many years on this planet, was the ‘Paul is Dead’ conspiracy.

A belief that Paul McCartney actually died in 1966 and that the band covered it up in the belief that it would affect their fan base and instead decided to hire a lookalike and soundalike to replace their cheeky chappy frontman (or irritating Scouse Twat as I like to call him) to continue with the full Beatles line up.

For all of my open-minded regard for other conspiracy theories, this is for me perhaps the most ridiculous. To be fair, I have often joked about how much more corpse-like Paul McCartney looks each time they roll him out onto stage to once again perform the nauseating and repetitive ‘Hey Jude’ as the anti-climatic finale at some charity gig or benefit concert but I had never for one minute thought that he actually was dead. Sometimes wished it, perhaps, when we were hearing “La, La, La, La-la-la-la, la-la-la-la, Heeeeey Jude” for the eleventy-billionth time, but certainly never believed it.

It does, however, far better explain the title to his 1993 album ‘Paul is Live’.

On that lighter note, I will leave you to your ponderings.

Until next weeks installment on ‘who knows what subject’.

The Virtual Recluse

 

P.S. So many apologies for the insanely irritating ‘La La La Lalalala Lalalala Hey Jude….oh Judey, Judey, Judey” ear-worm.

I suggest you get yourself onto YouTube and look up La Serenissima (Venice in Peril) by Rondo Veneziano as a speedy remedy.

There are no nauseating lyrics to drive you insane, just a repetitive:

Diddle liddle, aaah, Diddle liddle, aaah, Diddle liddle, aaah,

Diddle liddle, aaah, Diddle liddle, aaah, Diddle liddle, aaah,

Diddle liddle eee, diddle, liddle eeee Diddle, liddle, eee,

Diddle liddle eee, Diddle liddle.